Your Vibe Attracts Your Tribe - Part 3

There are a few friends who stay constant -- the ones who move in and out of my life but are somehow always present.   They are few and far between.  These are by far the most rewarding friendships. Very often they have been a High School or College friend with whom a most tumultuous time is shared.  These are the cherished friends.  Ten years can go by with very little or no contact.  And then one day for some reason the stars align and we see each other again.  And it feels like we were never away from each other.  We pick up right where we left off the last time we saw each other whether it was two years ago or ten years ago.  It always feels the same and it always feels good.  It’s a joy and a comfort and the first time it happened I knew, that no matter what, no matter where our lives took us, I could call that person tomorrow and it would happen all over again.  These are the friendships that last forever – the friends who know me better than anyone and still love me even with all my faults and weaknesses.  They are the ones who see me for exactly who I am and accept me just the way I am.  These are the friends who  truly enrich my life and I will protect these friendships forever.  Others will come and go and will also enrich my life and I give thanks for the time I have with them and appreciate what we give each other during that time.  For every person I meet, I meet for a reason and that reason is not always immediately evident. 

I met Taylor at a Chippendales Strip Club.  We had been invited there by a mutual friend who was having a birthday party.  I quickly lost interest and headed to a back wall to sit down.  Taylor sat there also looking equally bored.  I guess neither of us were drunk enough to appreciate what was happening on stage.  We started talking and that was the beginning of one of my first meaningful friendships in California.  Taylor had a good friend, Heidi.  They were both lawyers and both Jewish.  The Jewish part is only important because having never celebrated Christmas in their own childhood homes they loved helping us decorate our Christmas tree.   Every year they would each bring a very special ornament to add to our collection and spend a good amount of time finding the perfect spot to put it.  Pop and I spent many evenings over dinner laughing with these two beautiful, strong women.  It was Heidi who taught me about appreciating people for who they were.  We were at a party and Pop was telling one of his long stories that only Pop can tell.  Going off into tangents, giving more details than necessary but nevertheless having everyone’s rapt attention.  I turned to Heidi and said “Doesn’t this drive you crazy.”  Laughing she replied “Oh no, that’s just Jon.” And she laughed some more.  And she was right.  It was an integral part of Pop’s personality and from then on I never let it bother me.  I will always appreciate Heidi for being so insightful. 

Taylor and Heidi remained in our lives for as long as we lived in southern California.  We made an interesting foursome at parties and spent many evenings at each others’ homes.  One night Taylor and Heidi had just spent the evening at our second floor apartment in Santa Monica. We had done a fair amount of drinking and I’m not sure they should have been driving home but this was years back when none of us were as tuned into the problem of drinking and driving. They had come in different cars and as they trotted down the steps to their respective cars Pop and I waved out the window. They hesitated briefly giving each other a hug and laughing again about something more one of them had said. Then they each got into their own cars Taylor in the front and Heidi behind her. As Taylor backed up to get out Heidi moved forward to get out and they crashed into each other. They both immediately popped out of their cars laughing hysterically and falling into each other’s arms, Pop and I watching from above doing the same. I’m not sure that I have ever spent as many evenings laughing as long and as hard as I did with these two beautiful women and I greatly missed their friendship when we moved.  I am still in touch with Heidi and see her on occasion and we laugh like we did 40 years before.  Taylor died of leukemia in her late fifties and I still grieve that loss.